Logan - 3 Weeks Old!

So yesterday Logan turned 3 weeks old!  Yay!!  He celebrated it by weighing 5lbs 8oz and moving up to 4 bottles/breast feedings a day.  What a good little man!

We had a pediatrician interview in the morning.  this one is literally 7 minutes from our house, so that was a big plus for us.  We met with the doctor.  He has experience in the NICU and actually knew some of the doctors up at Northside.  We liked that he had dealt with preemies before, because that's a big requirement for us.  The only thing is that we never really felt comfortable with him, so we have a lot of thinking to do this weekend.

After that Jesse went off to work and I ran to CVS to pick up Claritin for my rash.  As I was leaving the Home Depot Delivery people called and said they would be at our house with the new dryer in the next 30 minutes.  Well, they showed up less than 30 minutes later and efficiently installed our new dryer and removed the old one.  It was early enough I was able to get in 2 loads of laundry before going up to the hospital!  Yay!!

After a short stop at Chick-fil-a, I arrived at the hospital a little before 2:00.  Little Man was sleeping away, so I changed his uneventful diaper and started to wake him up!  I had a lactation consultation at 2:00, so Logan was weighed and placed in my arms for breastfeeding.  Well, like the night before, he latched on great after a few minutes of waking up.  He knew exactly what to do and started eating for about 10-15 minutes straight!  After he was done, he was weighed again and showed he had 8cc of milk.  Yay Little Man!  After that, we gave him a bottle with the rest of the milk he needed in it.  The lactation consultant started him out and he was eating so great, that she kept forcing him to take little breaks so he wouldn't choke himself or stop breathing.  She showed me how to do it and I tried, but I couldn't get him in a godo position and he seemed to be tiring out.  But she took over again and he did great.  Logan and I will just need to practice.  He took about 15cc from that, for a total of 23cc.  He had the rest through his tube - so overall a successful feeding!

After that we just hung out and waited for Jesse to come up.  Jesse got there a little late because traffic was horrible!  Stupid Valentine's Day!  :)  He held our little man for awhile, and then at 6:30 we went down to the 6th floor for dinner and a meeting with other parents of preemies in the NICU.  This is a weekly meeting, but we hadn't been able to make it.  We weren't sure what to expect at all and were a little hesitant.  Well, it turned out to be great.  It's like an AA meeting but for NICU parents.  Everyone shared their stories of pregnancy and labor and how their babies were doing.  There were parents of singletons like us, parents of twins, and one new mom of triplets - and they were conceived naturally with no fertility drugs, etc.!

It was really nice going and hearing what others went through, how their babies are doing and all of the different stages.  I think most of us were on the magnesium sulfate.  A few stayed in the HRP (high risk pregnancy) wing - which is where I would have been moved if Logan had stayed in a little longer.  One stayed in there for 10 weeks.  It's really nice to be amongst people who understand what we're going through.  They understand the frustration of not knowing when our children are coming home, of what it's like to be on the 2nd floor NICU and be jealous of those babies that move to the 7th floor (feeders & growers).  They know what it's like to think "I should still be pregnant." and to almost feel like a part of you is missing when it shouldn't be.  They understand the feelings of envy when we walk out to our car after spending hours in the NICU to see another mother going home with her baby.  Sure, I get to have my body back sooner than I would have, but that's just a consolation prize.  My child is hooked up to monitors and in the NICU.  He's not home with us, so yeah, part of me would still rather be large and pregnant.  But, we have to learn to live with the cards we are dealt.  As one of the dads said, we get to know our little guy 8 weeks earlier than originally planned.  We get to really learn how to take care of him.  We're not just sent home after two days looking at each other going, "What do we do now?"  So we have to find the silver linings to this situation.

After the meeting, we went back upstairs to say goodnight to our little guy and then head home.  Here are our Valentine's Day pictures, including the Valentine made for us by the support staff.

Logan Yesterday & Today

So how is Mr. Logan doing?  Well, he's 35 weeks today!  One more week and we're to the point where I could have gone back to work if I had been on bedrest.  Ha!  Little Man is now up to 5lbs 6.5oz!  He's doing better with the bottles, so they've added another one.  I don't think he's ever finished all of both bottles on the same day, but he's doing well enough they feel confident he can add in another one - that is if he is awake!  He hasn't had any recorded apnea cases (or really bradycardia), so that's good, too!  All in all he is just feeding and growing.

Before heading up to see Logan, I managed to get an appointment with my dermatologist to see about my rash.  Basically, they believe it's an allergic reaction to medicine - most likely the Advil I'd been taking (800mg 3x a day right after I came home, then as needed).  But, because I've been on so many different medicines over the last three weeks, they couldn't say for sure it was the Advil.  It's definitely spread, too - up and down my arms, across my chest, on my stomach, on my lower back and now on my thighs.  Yummy!  Gotta love rashes!  The dermatologist said that it's not contagious, and to use a steroid creme and take one Claritin a day - as long as the neonatologist said I could.  Fortunately, the creme and Claritin are acceptable for Logan, so that's good.

Yesterday I spent most of the day up there.  Jesse was able to spend some time from 2:00-2:30 there as well.  He had a doctor's appointment across the street and was in the area.  I tried nursing Logan at his 2:00 feeding, but he decided to sleep through it, so we snuggled instead.  I can't complain about that!  Around 3:00, he had some VIP visitors:  His Grandpa Wade, Uncle Carson, Cousin Austin & Great-Aunt Lynda.  They got to see him looking even better and bigger - but he did sleep through most of their visit, too.  Silly Little Man!  Jesse came back and hung with his family some.  While he did that I went and visited our friends who just had their little girl.  She is such a beauty!  Maybe one day she will be Logan's girlfriend - hehe!  Regardless, she will definitely be his playmate.

After I returned to Logan's pod, Jesse and his family left to go out to eat while I tried to nurse him.  He latched a little and suckled a little, but that was all.  I held him for awhile before putting him back so I could pump.  When I was done, he had decided to wake up.  He was just looking around and absorbing everything.  I had such a hard time leaving him!  I had Book Club, though, and really wanted to make it since I had missed the last one and we always take a break in December.  So I left and headed to Book Club where I stuffed my face with some delicious chocolate cookies (yum yum!).

Today I didn't go up to the hospital until Jesse got off work.  We had a pediatrician interview around lunchtime.  We have three lined up this week - one today, one tomorrow & one on Friday.  We really liked the office and the pediatrician a lot.  In fact, we liked him so much, we're worried about how we'll make a decision if they are all that great.  Yikes!  It's not that I want one to be awful, but if there can be something we don't like, then that will help.  We have to have one picked out before Logan can come home.  We'll see how tomorrow goes!

I've also been carting back one load of laundry each day to my mom's house to dry.  Even though our dryer broke, I still needed to get laundry done.  It's been building up way too much.  We get our new dryer tomorrow, so that will be great to be able to dry the clothes at home!  I also had to run to the vet to pick up a special shampoo for Yoda.  It turns out he has some fungal infection and needs to be bathed twice a week for at least 4 weeks.  He will be one clean pumpkin!

Jesse and I headed up to Northside when he got off work.  We were running a little behind and I was worried that we would miss his feeding.  Thankfully, the nurse had decided to start his feeding late (she had 4 babies who all were supposed to be fed at the same time - not really possible if more than one needs a bottle).  So Jesse changed Logan's diaper and I settled in to nurse Logan.  The nurse weighed him before hand, just in case he had a good session.  Well, Little Man decided that tonight he was going to nurse well.  After about 5 minutes of trying to decide what he was going to do, he latched on and started suckling.  He was breathing well and swallowing.  I was so proud of him!  He kept eating for about 10 or so minutes straight, maybe a little longer.  When he finally seemed tired out, we weighed him again and he had taken in 10cc!  That's almost a quarter of his regular feedings.  If he can keep this up, we can conquer one feeding with just nursing.  That will make it easier when he gets home.  I'm not really looking forward to having to pump, then bottle feed him every 3 hours.  I know there are other moms out there who have done that.  I can only imagine that takes up pretty much the majority of your time with a newborn.

After I nursed him, I passed him off to Jesse so I could pump.  We just sat quietly in the room for about an hour and Jesse got to snuggle our little man.  We finally put him back and tucked him in.  We stopped by my mom's to get one last load of laundry I hadn't had a chance to pick up and came home.  Next week I hope to concentrate on getting his room set up.  The first thing I have to do, though, is wipe down his walls, and I just haven't been able to get around to doing that.  So... we'll see.  Anyways, here are some pictures of the little guy looking cute as cute can be:

Oh, and thanks Kristi, Wayne & Jake for his Star Wars crib sheet!  Everyone loves it!

Logan Day 19

Well, there really aren't any changes with Logan.  He's gained more weight - now 5lbs 4oz - he's now a pound up from birth weight!  He is still on two bottles - and didn't finish either of them yesterday, so he's going to continue to work on those.  On the downside, he's had more apnea episodes.  :(  He actually had one right when I got there.  His heart rate decreased and he need minor stimulation to get out of it.  They wondered if he had some sort of infection, so they ran some blood work on him.  Poor little man was stuck 3 times in his heels.  He actually slept through most of the sticks.  He sure is a trooper!  Thankfully, the blood work came back negative - so no infections!

I got up to the hospital around 1:45.  I changed his diaper and because he slept through that, the nurse and I decided to let him eat through his feeding tube.  Well, as soon as she left and I was sitting with my little man, he decided to wake up.  He was so cute!  Just looking at me and looking around, absorbing everything!  I read him a French book and sang to get him to go to sleep.  We just sat and rocked for about 45 minutes.  I put him down, though, because I needed to pump.

I continued to hang out with him and talk to the nurse and the nurse practitioner.  It's nice being there during the day and just sitting around.  The nurse talked to me about how to clean out his nose or any spit-up.  I brought up some books, my laptop, Kindle, and graded papers that need to go in the gradebook.  When he woke up and was looking around, I sang to him to get him to sleep (we needed him to be awake for his 5:00 feeding when I nursed him).

Jesse got to the hospital around 5:00.  So he changed Logan's diaper and we prepared to nurse.  He was weighed and then he was given to me.  He latched on, and he got a little milk, but nothing measurable.  It's ok, though, because he was just so cute!  He will catch on eventually.  I don't remember if I already said this, but the nurses said he won't really catch on until around 36 weeks.  Then Jesse got to hold him while I pumped, so they hung out together for a little while.

We left around 7:00 to head home.  It definitely is harder every day to leave him.  We want him home so badly, but not until he's ready.  I'm pretty sure our first night with him we're not going to sleep at all. At the hospital he is monitored constantly, so if something goes wrong, someone is there to figure out how to fix it.  But at home, it's just us - no heart rate monitors, O2 sensors, etc.  Of course, they won't let him come home until they are confident he won't need those, but it will still be scary.  He had a week without apnea episodes and now he's had a bunch in a few days - albeit minor ones.  I definitely wonder what it's like for non-NICU babies and parents.  To be able to go home with your baby after 2 days in the hospital!  I'm not going to lie, we get a little jealous of all of you "normal" moms.  But, we do know, that when Logan does get to come home, it will be a much sweeter homecoming!

On another note, it looks like I have some sort of rash/allergic reaction on my arms & elbows.  I thought it was just winter dry skin, but then noticed that the red spots were raised, and when I looked at my elbow in the mirror, it is surrounded by red angriness.  Now I'm all paranoid and feel like I'm itching all over the place.  Guess I'll be heading to the dermatologist this week - hopefully tomorrow.

Well, I will leave you with some cute pictures of the little man!

Oh, and congrats to some good friends of ours who had their little girl early this morning!  We hope to meet her tomorrow!

Logan Day 18

Well Logan is still gaining weight.  He's up to 5lbs 2oz and his feedings have increased to 41cc.  He took most of his bottles today.  The nurse says that he's not a guzzler or super pro-active on the bottles, but he stays awake the full 30 minutes and drinks at his own pace.  Unfortunately, he had a few minor apnea episodes, so that's a bit of a bummer.  We know that it's normal for a preemie, but it still bums us out because he'd gone a week without one episode.  The nurse practitioner said the bottle feeding is what can lead to these episodes.  It's the whole suck, swallow, breathe thing - sometimes preemies don't always pace themselves well enough and their breathing gets messed up.

Jesse and I went up to see Logan in the early evening.  Whenever I go up, now, Logan and I are going to practice nursing.  Today we were unsuccessful.  He kept falling asleep.  The nurse mentioned that he had been awake for 2 hours after his 2 o'clock feeding.  She said she just loves his facial expressions and how alert he can be.  She told us that he's going to be smart.  He's already flirting.  :)  We just snuggled him for the rest of our visit.  One thing we both hate about the NICU is all of the monitors and alarms and stuff.  Sometimes random alarms go off for Logan.  We have learned to ignore the alarms.  If there's something to be concerned about, then the nurses will be there.  Well, today his O2 alarm kept going off over and over again.  I started getting worried.  Jesse was holding Logan and would try to rearrange him, but that didn't change.  Finally, the nurse came in and mentioned that he may be experiencing some reflux and to hold him up against Jesse's shoulder.  So Logan was rearranged again, and that made all the difference, which helped us breathe a sigh of relief.

Here are some pictures from today:

Logan Day 17

Little Man is still rockin' it!  Today he is up to 5lbs 1oz.  He's been gaining so well that they are going to decrease the amount of calories they add to his milk.  He took his 2nd bottle pretty well - 20cc of the 39cc needed.  Fingers crossed he is able to take 2 bottles by end of day tomorrow and they increase him to 3.

Jesse and I headed up this morning to go visit Logan.  I had a lactation consultation at 11:00 and we needed to be there around 10:45.  We were running a little behind and were rushing out the door (not to mention really tired, too).  Well, we got to the hospital and Jesse was going to drop me off so I could go on up while he parked.  I turned to grab the bag we use to transport my pump parts and realized we had left it at home!  Oops...  But I had to have it.  I had to pump after nursing.  So poor Jesse turned around and went home and back to get the parts.

So I went upstairs and changed Logan's diaper and we prepared for nursing.  I finally have my own nursing pillow - a My Breastfriend (Thanks Tricia & Craig!) - so I got that ready while Logan was weighed.  Then, he settled in my arms and began to nurse.  After about 15 minutes, the lactation consultant weighed him again.  He got about 8cc's of milk - way to go Logan!  She said he probably won't really pick up on nursing until around 36 weeks.  She said that's usually around when everything clicks for them, so right now we'll really just be doing practice, and then finish either with his feeding tube or a bottle.  Well, after the 15 minutes was up, I just snuggled Logan until Jesse returned - so I got to hold him for almost an hour!  Jesse got back to the hospital around noon.  We had an Infant CPR class at 12:30, so I had to hurry up and pump so we could get to the class.  Jesse held Logan while I pumped, and then we put him back and went down one floor to the class.

It turned out that Jesse and I were the only ones signed up for the class, so it was basically a private Infant CPR.  Northside requires parents of NICU babies to take the class before their babies go home, so we decided to go on and take it now.  The class was 2 hours & went over Infant CPR, Infant Heimlich, SIDS & The Period of PURPLE Crying.  These were all great things to learn about, but I couldn't help but feel a little paranoid - I started worrying about situations to use CPR or the Heimlich.  But we are all educated now and hopefully could pull through in a crisis.  I think I would put more faith in Jesse than in me.  I can be the one who calls 911 while he performs the procedures...

Once the class was over, we ate lunch.  I was starving!  Of course, the only place open was McDonald's, so that's where we ate.  Then we headed back upstairs to see our main man and so I could pump again.  Jesse read Dr. Seuss's ABC Book while I pumped.  Then we said good bye to our little guy.  We went to Babies R Us and bought Logan's carseat and pack n play.  This weekend was the end of a 15% off sale - and we had a bunch of giftcards that we decided to use.  Plus, hopefully Logan will need to do his carseat test soon, so we want to be prepared.  After that it was homeward bound.  We were pretty worn out from our day - it was a lot for us.

Jesse has spent the rest of the day working to put the Star Wars room back together.  I went out to dinner with my mom, then came home and ordered a new dryer from Lowe's.  The only problem is that it's not scheduled to be here for two weeks!  I don't know if it had a delivery date when I bought it, but that's too long!  Sure, we can hang some clothes up, but we don't really have anywhere to do that, except on our shower curtain rod.  I think I'm going to call their main customer line tomorrow and see if there's anything they can do to move up the date.  I'm definitely going to play the just-had-a-baby card. I have craploads of laundry that needs to be done!  Plus, we're constantly bringing home Logan's things from the hospital (he pees out of his diaper...  His little manly parts need to be aiming down when he gets his diaper changed, not up.  Oops...).  Well, anyways, here are some new pics of our fast-growing little guy.  Enjoy!  We certainly do.  :)

Logan Days 15 & 16

Logan is still rockin' it!  As of Thursday he was 4lbs 12.5oz, and today he was up to 4lbs 15oz.  Little Man is a growing machine.  He's filling out and his cheeks are getting chubbier.  I have to say, he's so cute!

He's doing great with his feedings, too.  Yesterday he took 24cc of milk from a bottle.  He needs to be able to take 39cc.  Well, today he took the full bottle, so they are going to see if he will do 2 bottles a day!  Also, he and I have homework - to work on breastfeeding.  So now when I go up, I am going to nurse him.  Then, he will finish off with a bottle.  That means I need to better coordinate with the nurses when I will be up there, because they want to space out his feedings.  They don't want non-feeding tube feedings to be back-to-back, because those can tire him out.

I'm working on getting his room put together - I washed and put away all of his clothes.  Now I need to wipe down the walls in there and try to put together his bookcase.  He has tons of books already!

Yesterday Jesse and I got to the hospital later than normal because we had an appointment elsewhere at 5:00.  We got to Northside around 7:00 and hung out with our little man until about 8:00-ish or so.  We just held and snuggled him while we were there.  I love the little noises he makes as he sleeps, it's so cute!  The nurses say he's a good baby, he just sleeps and hardly cries.  Let's hope he keeps that up when he comes home!

Today Jesse's office had a surprise baby shower for him after work!  I wanted to show up around 4:30 when it began, but I went up to school after classes were out to drop stuff off and pick stuff up.  It was weird being there after being gone for 3 weeks, but so very nice to see everyone!  I miss work and seeing everyone.  Since Logan isn't home yet, it's pretty weird being at home while school is in.  Sometimes I look at the clock and think, "Oh, it's 3rd period right now."  But the point of this is that I had fun catching up with everyone and ended up leaving later than originally planned, so I got to the baby shower around 5:30, and then had to leave at 6:00 to go home and pump.

After that, Jesse and I went up to the hospital to see our Little Man.  He was snoozing away in his bed. It's great that we can just lift him out ourselves now.  We don't have to wait for nurses to get him for us or put him back, we can do it ourselves.  So we just cuddled our guy.  I could just stare at him all day long.  He just slept for us and didn't really wake up until we were about to leave.

Of course, not everything can go perfectly.  When we got back home, we discovered that our dryer has stopped working, so now we get to go dryer shopping.  Yay!  Super fun, just what I wanted to do...  Oh well, c'est la vie!

On a brighter note, here are some pictures of Logan from yesterday and today!

Logan Day 14

Today Logan is 34 weeks.  This is how long I was supposed to stay on bed rest...  Oh well.  My little man had other plans for us, and that's ok.  Logan is still doing great!  He has gained to 4lbs 10.8oz!  2.8oz in one day, wow!  The nurse practitioner said that they will increase his food tonight to 43cc/feeding.  He hasn't had any breathing problems, so that's a good thing, too.

Today he had his first bottle feeding.  The nurse holds him on his side for his feedings - since that's how nursing babies lay.  They also use a slow flow nipple so he's not being inundated with milk.  They told us not to expect much for the first feeding since he's never done this before.  We can't help but hope that he does well, though, and exceeds expectations.  After all, this is the last big hurdle for him.  She showed us how to bring the bottle to his mouth and not force the nipple in his mouth (get your mind out of the gutter!).  Then, just watch and make sure he's breathing while he eats.  She said that they will only give them 30 minutes to feed.  After that they end up burning more calories than they eat, so it's pointless.  She said whatever he doesn't eat will go in his feeding tube.  After about 10 minutes of the bottle, she showed us how to burp him.  Considering this is his first bottle, Logan aced it!  He coordinated the suck, swallow breathe - just like in breast feeding.  He also took in 5cc.  Hopefully tomorrow he takes in a little more.  Once he takes most of his bottle, they will add a second one in.  The nurse said usually it takes awhile to go from one to two bottles, but then they move pretty quickly to 4.  Then it slows down again, but a baby may go from 6-8 in one day.  Also, they will space out the bottles - one in the evening and one earlier in the day.  Bottle feeding is a very tiring activity for preemies, they get very worn out doing this.  He pretty much conked out during his bottle.  He's getting spoiled being fed through a tube.  Now he has to work for it.

Jesse and I snuggled our little man once the tube feeding began.  He woke up for that part with me.  He had his eyes open and was looking around to see what was going on.  He kept smiling off and on and it turns out he has a dimple on his right cheek!  Jesse read Logan his cousin Molly's favorite book - Five Little Monkeys (Mary - yesterday we read him Darsie's favorite!).  Then, Logan started pooping - which may be why he was smiling.  Jesse changed his diaper this go round.  He did not get pooped on, though.  His day will come, his day will come.  Then, we tucked Logan back in and left.  Our neighbor brought us dinner tonight, so we wanted to make sure we were home for it.

It's hard, though.  We feel guilty because we don't spend all day with him.  But we're torn in two directions.  We have so much to do at home - putting the house back in order, getting his room ready, laundry, and spending time with the pets, too.  We don't want them to feel neglected either.  Plus, Jesse is at work, and goes straight to the hospital from there.  Then we get home around 7:00-ish, and have to do stuff around the house here.  We want to make sure the house is ready for when Logan does come home.  Hopefully we can get the house in order soon and spend a little more time with him.  I want to start going up in the day more often.  I just need to bring things with me to do.

Here are some pictures of Logan eating and smiling, and just being cute.  At the rate he's going, he'll be 5lbs soon enough!